This Is. American Idol. (Or The Voice or X Factor)

For someone who can't sing and doesn't really listen to pop music, I watch way too many shows about discovering pop talent. I watch the "big" ones, not religiously, but enough that I can hold my own in a discussion. (Not that it ever happens, but it could and I feel better knowing I am prepared for such an event.) I'm not sure why I get pulled into these shows. In some ways, I think it's a throwback to my love for "America's Top 40" that somehow, I made that hit happen. ("I bought that single and now it's Number One in the USA! I made it happen!")

All three have their pros and cons. Right now, it seems like "The Voice" is the closest to getting it right, although they have yet to produce a star. "X Factor" tried to have variety: they had groups, younger kids, older singers, but it struggled, and the winner, another belt-y girl. But I think that Simon Cowell can make it work, so I think it will get better, although I doubt it will be the mega-hit that "American Idol" was back in the day.

The "American Idol" season is kicking off, and most would agree that it's definitely missing something. Is it age of the show? Is it the vanilla that the judges are determined to bring every week? Is it that, at this point, it's all teenage girls and dialing robots that vote? (Remember when other people used to vote? Or was that just me?) I don't know why I care, but I just want to yell, "Be better!" There are so many things that need changing: the judges need to actually judge. I'd say they need to get rid of the audience. Sometimes the performance really is awful and if the judges say something, all they get is a bunch of boos. Yeah, they should have a thicker skin than that, but no one likes boos, so it's easier just to be all positive, which is just boring.

I'm always torn about how much say the judges should have. On one hand, it seems like America is, frankly, boring, and will vote for the same types, so maybe if the judges just pick the best ones, that would help. But, on the other hand, I don't exactly trust the judges. I kind of like the "So You Think You Can Dance" model: America picks the bottom three and then the judges pick who's going home. Actually, here's what I propose: now that we're down to the top 13, each judge gets to protect one contestant a week. This might force the judges to have actual opinions. After it gets down to, say 10, they get to protect two, then one, then America is on its own.

None of these will ever be early-season "American Idol." It's too diluted: by the number of seasons and number of other shows like it. But the current crop of "American Idol" judges just aren't going to generate any excitement, so I watch when I'm in the mood. I still have fun criticizing song choice or trying to see a kid struggle with songs they have never heard before it was theme week. ("Queen? What's a 'Queen'? Why are there men singing?") It's familiar, it's fun, but it's no longer must-see tv. These days, I'm more interested in Cee-lo and his cat. That cat is a star!