This was a year of great loss on a personal level. One thing you can say about a major loss is that all other issues become background. I never think it's right to rank things like love or pain or sadness, but sometimes things happen that do make other events pale in comparison.
Going through this year, with all its ups and downs, I feel like I've grown in my ability to handle things. I'm no zen-like center of calm, but I'm not quite as touchy as I was. That's not to say that I don't have times I breakdown or lose my temper, but I think (I hope) that it's not as often or over just little things. I feel like I can look at how I am reacting to a situation and I can figure out where my reaction is coming from. (I will admit that some of this self-actualization comes after I've freaked out a bit and calmed down. I'm still working over here!)
I hope this coming year has less drama and (dare I say it?) is a bit more boring. But, even more than that, I hope that I keep figuring myself out and I keep working on being a better version of me.
Happy New Year!
3 comments:
I just spent a ridiculously long period of time reading back through years of your posts. To impress upon you how important this was to me, my stomach was nauseated and I'm getting a headache because I am so hungry, but I really needed to read about your life. I am fascinated by the lack of information you post about your current personal life.
So, now that I know almost nothing which is one step up from where I was forty minutes ago I can say with assurance that you are a wonderful writer, and that I hope you have a spectacular next year. I think perhaps you deserve it.
Thank you for the kind words. (Please, do eat, though -- the words will be here.) I do try to keep details out of my posts for various reasons (privacy of other, etc). I love how some people (you, for example) can share the details of what they go through. Maybe I need to explore my interior more.
It makes you mysterious. :)
I write details because by writing them it allows me to distance myself from them.
I think for some writing the details brings them to close. As you said today it also gives up some of the control of your life. You allow people, some strangers, to form opinions about important and personal things going on in your life. The problem with this is that they also sometimes tell you these opinions.
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